Of Loans, Frugality and Children…

I’ve been praying to the Lord the past 2 days for a message… a sign… something. And with what had just happened 2 days earlier, the terrible incident between me and my son, I felt so lost… it’s as if I ran and ran from the Lord because I so badly disappointed Him, searching for a place to hide, thinking He might not forgive me.

I so desperately prayed… so hard that I wanted to feel His love and mercy… I cried out to Him asking for forgiveness. I needed to feel Him… I needed to have the Holy Spirit within me… but during that moment, my guilt and despair was like a thick hard wall preventing me to come closer to God to receive fresh grace.

It bothered me… I couldn’t hear the Lord… I couldn’t feel the Spirit. Regret and pain were consuming me… but it never hindered my efforts to intently pray.

I dismissed the evil spirit of despair… and I held on to the Lord’s unwavering mercy and unconditional love.

Praise God! He has spoken to my heart… my heart is blazing like wildfire… aflame for the Lord. The Spirit has consumed my entire being and I am once again overwhelmed.

I opened my Bible and the verses that touched a chord in my heart weren’t so hard to find. In fact, they immediately popped out right in front of me as I opened my book. It answered every immediate concern hanging above my head. Praise God!

Though I completely read 2 consecutive chapters of Sirach (Chapters 29 & 30) since every teaching moved me, I will only list down on this entry the more notable verses which have made the most impact.

Lend to your neighbor in his hour of need, and pay back your neighbor when a loan falls due; Keep your promise, be honest with him, and you will always come by what you need.

- Sirach 29:2-3

Be it little or much, be content with what you have, and pay no heed to him who would disparage your home;

- Sirach 29:23

He who loves his son chastises him often, that he may be his joy when he grows up.

He who disciplines his son will benefit from him, and boast of him among his intimates.

He who educates his son makes his enemy jealous, and shows his delight in him among his friends.

At the father’s death, he will seem not dead, since he leaves after him one like himself, Whom he looks upon through life with joy, and even in death, without regret: The avenger he leaves against his foes, and the one to repay his friends with kindness.

He who spoils his son will have wounds to bandage, and will quake inwardly at every outcry.

A colt untamed turns out stubborn; a son left to himself grows up unruly.

Pamper your child and he will be a terror for you, indulge him and he will bring you grief.

Share not in his frivolity lest you share in his sorrow, when finally your teeth are clenched in remorse.

Give him not his own way in his youth, and close not your eyes to his follies.

Bend him to the yoke when he is young, thrash his sides while he is still small, Lest he become stubborn, disobey you, and leave you disconsolate.

Discipline your son, make heavy his yoke, lest his folly humiliate you.

- Sirach 30:1-13